Archive for September 8th, 2006

Roger Ebert once described the perfect date movie as one that provokes the couple to talk to each other. And I’d have to agree with him. Bart Freundlich’s Trust the Man follows the more popular, unfortunate definition: A compromise for the ladies and the fellas that pleases no one, and usually sucks your will to live.

Oh, Trust the Man is meant to be high-end, intelligent enjoyment. It stars art house denizens Julianne Moore (Freundlich’s wife) and Billy Crudup (Jesus’ Son) and features more upscale NYC locales than season 5 of Seinfeld. It’s really a shallow, aimless affair that will lead to conversations I’m sure Ebert never imagined.

“Jesus Christ, why did you take me to this?”

“You like Julianne Moore!”

“When she’s naked!”

“I hate you! I’ll be in the car!”

The plot of Trust the Man follows two New York City couples grappling with issues. Tom (Duchovny) and Rebecca are married with kids, heading toward middle-age and a crisis. Between her busy life as a successful actress and his life as a “househusband,” their sex life is stagnant, which is a major concern for the always horny Tom. Tobey (Crudup) and Elaine (Maggie Gyllenhaal) have been dating for seven years, but his immaturity and reluctance to marry is vexing to the mommy-minded, level-headed Elaine.

From these characters we get endless scenes of relationship blather that never answer the most important question: How did these couples find such misery? When numerous scenes of female and male bonding aren’t unfolding, Freundlich ups the laugh factor, a disastrous decision. These scenes don’t happen in the flow of the main plot, so every time one pops up it’s distracting, never mind a bit desperate: Why address the problems of the romantically anguished when you can have a carb-craving Moore choke on a piece of cake or Duchovny punched in the balls not once, but twice? Even worse, few of these scenes are funny.

Of course, Freundlich’s script is a mess. He doesn’t succeed at either comedy or drama–his comedic observations are tired and broad; he lacks the attention to detail of a good dramatist–and he certainly can’t blend the two elements. Profiling two couples would be OK if there was a significant contrast, but not if they’re both vaguely unhappy. The movie’s large number of scenes shows a lack of conviction to the story and his characters. And he relies on New York locales as if the spell of Woody Allen will be cast, and shots of Sardi’s or Lincoln Center will make a shoddy plot authentic and poorly sketched characters brim with eloquent ennui.

The talented leads can’t do much here. You feel that they’re not acting as much as trying to find a grip on the material. Putting Moore, Duchovny, Gyllenhaal, and Crudup in this movie, is like putting Tiger Woods and Vijay Singh in a miniature golf tournament. It’s a waste of their time and those in attendance.

GRADE: **

MPAA RATING: R

The thing about Sweet is that there’s a host (Seth Herzog) a revolving DJ friend, a bunch of guest comics and a mom. So it feels like you’re hanging out in someones living room and a bunch of guys are just taking turns telling stories.
That was especially true this Thursday at Sweet when the guests were Will Frankin, whose non-sensical ramblings only made sense to those who knew him, Jakob Lodwick, who brought a home movie of Mr God vs. Mr Gay, and Leo Allen, who was pretty much making things up off the top of his head.

This particular Thursday was special because it was also the host of the LVHRD Society’s ‘Dance Hard’ auditions. Judges Kristen Sloane of the NYC Ballet, John Viener of the Family Guy and actors Josh Charles, Sam Rockwell were brought in to decide among the seven contestants who would be eligible to move on the the real competition on September 12th. Unfortunately, it turned into a mass of ironic hipsterness. Only one girl (Sharon, in the video) could actually dance, and little did she know she would become the butt of several chauvinistic and racist jokes by Viener. After almost making another girl cry, the judges decided to send two contestants to the finals, Sharon and Drunky Brewster(pictured), who through her alcoholic haze was able to say English words, but not put them together in any kind of coherent sentence.

Any fan of comedy should stop by the Slipper Room on Thursday nights. It’s reminiscent of being in high school and somehow ending up at the house of someone you don’t know very well. Maybe you don’t get all the jokes, but over all you think it’s funny and have a good time. Sweet is the place where comics go to perform for each other.